A Traveler’s Evolving Love Affair With Bangkok

Frenetic, satiating, and (paradoxically) enlightening - the interwoven streets of Bangkok give birth to seemingly infinite microcosms. I first visited Thailand's capital in 2014. Back then, I was a greenhorn backpacker armed with a three-month work leave and a hunger for adventure. Such dispositions led me to the infamous tourist district known as Khao San Road. I guess I was mostly trying to emulate Leonardo Dicaprio in The Beach (heck, I even went to the beach that they filmed The Beach on). This go-round, I find myself in the back half of my 30s, renting a studio apartment in a radically different part of this Asian megalopolis, and with the goal of seeing everyday sides of the city. Revisiting Bangkok after a coming-of-age hiatus has been not only a curious observation of self but a deeper investigation into a place that is simultaneously timeless and ever-evolving.

Embracing the Adventure

Where to begin? Well, the first thing I noticed upon arrival was my body's diminished capacity to cope with jet lag. As I write this, the hour is somewhere between three and four in the morning. I went to bed, exhausted, at 9 pm, and then awoke, alert to the core of my being, at midnight (thus marking the third night in a row of roughly three hours of sleep). So here I sit with a little plug-in fan pointed at a desk dimly lit by a droopy light in the corner. Insomnia does suck, don't get me wrong, but it's also fun in a weird way. It presents an opportunity to do things differently - you know, like you do in your head when you imagine going on an adventure. As a health-conscious athletic type, I'm usually quite regimented. Especially when it comes to sleep. That's all well and good, but it does rob me of the cliche writer fantasy of clickity-clackiting away on a pulsing muse in the middle of the night. Viola! Thank you intercontinental air travel. The only kicker is I have to focus extra hard during the day to not zone out while walking the wild streets of Bangkok.

Navigating The Zoo

Traffic in Bangkok has a mind of its own. The highways are like a Jamanji migration, and the side streets are narrow, scooter-zagging affairs. Being a pedestrian is like the first day of a parkour class. You have to watch your every step but also be aware of what's ahead. This is a three-dimensional affair. Sometimes, the shoulder-width sidewalk (if there even is one) gives way to an awkward drainage system, which then gives way to the ramped entrance of a noodle restaurant or laundromat, which in turn gives way to an awkwardly parked car (or comes evening, mobile food carts). Presented with such a bottleneck, one must shoulder check (even if facing oncoming traffic, for that is merely a suggested direction of flow) and step into the road, perhaps while mumbling a vague prayer picked up at a local temple (i.e. Wat).

All this says nothing of the vertical hazards. At any time, a dangling wire, poky piece of metal, or overhanging storefront might throw a six-woot Westerner off his game. Throughout it all, the cars, shuttle buses, industrial trucks, and scooters seem to roll with whatever punches the road throws. However, their evasive maneuvers don't leave much of a margin for error. But despite the constant proximity to wheels and random hazards, the predominant footwear of choice for locals is flip-flops.

Given the dynamic cityscape, if you want to take a picture (because everything is endlessly photogenic in a National Geographic or hipster Instagram kind of way), you'll need to strategically pick a spot. Step into the leeside of a telephone pole, or climb the steps to one of the skywalks so that you can surrender the survival instinct for a moment and sink into the touristic task. The problem is, once you take that first picture, every slight change in angle becomes enamoring. Another step forward suddenly brings three new buildings of stimulating aesthetic into the frame. Or maybe a red car passes by in the morning rush hour (is it ever really not rush hour?) that perfectly accents the apartment above the aging massage parlor. The bottom line is, if you come to Bangkok, you're going to have a million photos to go through. Unless, that is, you do the unthinkable.

The last time I came to Bangkok, I was phoneless. I didn't take pictures, I didn't use Google Maps, I didn't have social media, and I didn't look up the reviews of every destination in advance. I just figured it out. And though I've since come to appreciate the technological middle way (to borrow a Buddhist term), I still think it's important to do some outings without the black mirror crutch.

As chaotic as this city seems, Bangkok sort of figures it out for you. There are subways, taxis, buses, tuk-tuks, and motorcycle couriers (hold on tight!) everywhere. The price differential isn't a deal breaker and the accompanying experience is part of the schtick, isn't it?. Admit it: you want to have that wild tuk-tuk story to tell your friends back home. You don't want to just summon ride shares all the time. The same goes for piecing together the metro puzzle, getting lost in translation outside the tourist zones, and trying all the delicious food, which is everywhere, and awesome, and spicy (that kind of sweat onto the table spice that, when cooled, sends you back into the sweltering night refreshed, and emboldened), and did I mention delicious?

Be Bold

Here's the thing. The world is not made of bubble wrap. And taking the overly cautious route, especially when traveling, sacrifices novel experiences. Besides, obsessing over safety has a funny way of manifesting the very object of concern (like a stiff driver who gets in more accidents, or a germaphobe who's always sick). So when it comes to eating in Thailand, you have to ask yourself how much control you can reasonably claim (i.e. preventative measures, pre-planned remedies, etc.), how much the notion of control is an illusion to begin with (just look at the recalls by Western food corporations that happen on a random, but regular basis), and how "Bourdain" you want to get with your trip.

Personally, if it's hot (or cold, depending on the goal) and if other people are eating it, then that's good enough for me. And honestly, I break both those rules on a daily basis. Give me some street meat. Give me those grape leaf rolls where you only find out what's in them once you start chowing down. Give me those piping hot fried dough ball things with the sweet creamy stuff inside. Give me a barbecued scorpion! Give it to me all in a plastic cup wrapped in a plastic bag (Greta Thornberg, you shush for a moment!). The food here erupts with flavor, and is mouth-wateringly affordable. I can't promise that nothing bad will happen. And you'll most likely get an uptick in bathroom stuff (pack some electrolytes). But that's travel. And nothing ventured, nothing gained. Right?

Massage Mania

Another age-related curveball I've noticed since my last trip is the stiffness and asymmetry that's formed in my body. Back in 2014, those Thai masseuses could twist me like a pretzel and I'd be all the better for it. Now, I'm a little more squeamish with the forceful manipulations. That said, much like the food and transit situations, it pays to throw caution to the wind. After all, for like ten bucks you get an hour massage, a little foot wash, and when it's all done you get to sip tea next to an adorned Buddha statue while ambient music and a trickly water fountain creates a serenading respite from the ubiquitous litany of honks and toots. Besides, you don't have to order the aggressive approach (i.e. the one where they climb all over you and crack your back). That's just the classic go-to.

Most parlors have full menus ranging from a simple foot rub, to a classic oil massage, to an herbal compress, and more. Just note that some parlors have different menus that they show once you get inside (perhaps you've heard of this). I'd love to be able to give you a hard and fast rule for sorting out which places are which, but I haven't yet figured that out. Sure, the fancy looking spots tend to be more legitimate, but at the same time, my current favorite is a low-key, super cheap spot by Wat Dhammamongkol where the lady knows how to get at every single muscle fibre and her mom just sleeps (and snores) on the table next to me. I guess what I'm trying to say is, look around, ask questions, and don't be afraid to just walk into any old place. Ultimately, you're in the driver's seat.

Familiar Anchors

As I expound on these out-of-the-comfort-zone exploits, I have to admit that I do appreciate Bangkok's modern familiarities that are blended into the ocean of tradition and ambiguous chaos. Sometimes, a 7-Eleven is a beacon in the night. At other times, a cafe with wifi and five-dollar espresso drinks is a sanctuary. Sometimes a pristine mega mall (and I mean, mega) reminds you that malls back home used to be fun. I no longer have the stamina for non-stop fish-out-of-water scenarios. But that is not a prerequisite for visiting Bangkok. There will be culture shock, no doubt, but of an intermittent variety. You can always come back to base, somewhere, somehow, to recharge. Case in point, last night I simply enjoyed a pint of Guinness in a grounding Irish pub.

The Political Vibe

Observing the politics of starkly different nations can be an amusing undertaking - one free of the intense attachment many people feel toward their own institutions. Bangkok strikes me as dichotomous. I suppose this could be said about pretty much anywhere, but in Bangkok, the pendulum appears to swing to wider extremes. On the one hand, it is a humble and traditional place. Over 95% of Thailand practices Theravada Buddhism (i.e. the oldest, and some might say, strictest branch) - as is evidenced by the repeating neighborhood shrines and a plethora of adored temples. On the other hand, Thai people are on their phones all the time, just like everybody else. Even my makeshift tour guide at Wat Dhammamongkol asked to take a selfie with me in front of the jade Buddha statue (Canadian jade, I might add). And across subsequent visits to other temples, I consistently saw ordained monks transfixed with their iPhones. I didn't even know those orange robes had pockets!

Thailand's laws seem just as spectrum stretching. For example, its Lèse Majesté article means that if you say anything bad about the king (i.e. Maha Vajiralongkorn), you're looking at serious jail time. In fact, in 2021, local woman, Anchan Preelert, was sentenced to 87 years (reduced to 43.5 after she confessed) for resharing disparaging Facebook posts. On the other hand, Thailand recently became the first Asian country to legalize cannabis. They say it's medical, but it's 100% recreational. I'm actually typing this paragraph (Well, I was. Now I'm editing it) from a co-work dispensary. And there's another one a few blocks from here. And one every block or two after that. So by American standards, Thailand is archaic in its speech laws, but overly progressive in terms of sociables (at least, federally, and for half its states).

I suppose another pertinent dynamic is Thailand's approach to LGBT+ stuff. During my first trip, the "ladyboys," or kathoey, as they're known here, were in full swing - seemingly unopposed. Whereas back home, I was just starting to hear about trans ideology from my social-studies step-sister. So they were ahead of the curve on that one. Flash forward to 2025, Thailand only just legalized same-sex marriage (though, they were one of the first Asian nations to do so) and has just sort of cruised along with its collective apathetic stance toward the broader categories. Compare that to the States, which amended its marriage laws in 2015, but has since become, shall we say, energized, around the gender bending issue.

Tourist Areas

Just because I'm seeking a genuine Bangkokian experience this time around, doesn't mean that I'm avoiding the tourist areas. Quite the contrary. Now that I've gained a bit of perspective on the culture, and picked up a few helpful phrases, visiting the 46-meter-long Reclining Buddha at Wat Pho (i.e. the oldest temple in Bangkok), ferrying across to the dizzyingly intricate Wat Arun (remember to dress politely), getting swept up in the crowds of the Grand Palace, or going on a shopping spree at MBK and the Weekend Market has been all the more enjoyable. I even doubled back on Khao San Road to connect with the ghost of my younger self.

I know that tourists, if heavily weighted in one direction, can be a bit grating. But Bangkok is a true international hub. Walking around these magnetic spaces I recognized accents from Germany, Romania, the UK, France, Portugal, Spain, the States, Australia (of course), India, and neighboring Asian countries (I can't yet distinguish each dialect). This shows that Thailand's epicenter is appropriate for everyone.

Parting Thoughts

It doesn't matter if you're a voracious foodie, a budding Buddhist, a partier, a digital nomad, an adventurous retiree, or some sort of hodgepodge, Bangkok can oblige. With its tireless layers of ancient culture and gripping commercialization, the capital of Thailand is not only a leaping off point for the rest of Southeast Asia, but a long-term destination in its own right. So as another sun sets over the smoggy cityscape, I'm happy that my travel plans are free for weeks to come. For there's no telling what version of Bangkok tomorrow will bring.